Periodic Wedding Freak Out.

I'm freaking out again. 5 months to go. The to-do list looks like this:

1. Invitations
2. Cake
3. Leon's ring
4. Photographer
5. Chafing dish, dinnerware, flatware and table cloth rentals
6. Decorations
7. Overall game plan

Breathe.

In....

Out...


I'll never get it done!!

Yeah, me too.

Last night I went to see a movie by myself. I've decided that I like to see movies by myself. It's kind of nice, a treat. Anyway, I saw Pieces of April, which I didn't think I'd like initially because it stars Katie Holmes. I'm not a big fan and I never watched Dawson's Creek. In this movie, she's great. So in the film, the mom has cancer and some of the family is on eggshells about it because it might be the mom's last holiday. The characters and message really hit close to home for me. I could see my sister and I in the siblings. My sister, the first pancake, and me, the good one. I remember going through the same thing in 1996-1998. We were told that my mother would be dead in 2 years. So we had to make the best of the holidays. It was difficult to enjoy ourselves knowing that it could be our last holidays with mom. It's something I'd not like to go through again. Here we are six years later and we still have mom. She's a little different now, but we all are and we still have her.

Laughing, crying, driving

After a long weekend, driving, playing music, drinking road sodas, staying up all night, eating and generally being social, we were driving home in day old underwear. Our hairs messed up and oily, clothes unkempt and obviously slept in, I was nearly delerious. I wanted badly to be home and showered and rested, but we we'd only started the long, gloomy ride home from the bay area. Leon was eating discounted chewing gum. Chewing up pieces and spitting them out of the car window when they lost their flavors. Real classy.

Me: "Hey, don't do that. A bird could pick that up and choke on it."
Leon: "A bird could pick that up and blow a bubble."

For some reason this struck me as possibly the funniest thing I've heard in months. So I laughed and laughed until I cried. It's a delicious feeling when your emotional reactions get crossed and you have two at once. It's like teetering on a balance beam and you could fall either way. The delight is maintaining the balance and enjoying both together for the weird animal that they become.

Volando Voy

Fun weekend. Sleepy times. I'm tired. All night I dreamed abour tigers. I think it's because of something I must have seen on television. Cable television. That I just paid $54 for. Convenient, multi-channel entertainment and live Kings games all season will be my financial ruin.

I guess I didn't like what I wrote previously, so I'm writing this instead:

For my job, I do some local marketing stuff for Hawaii. I know, that's great huh? But I haven't been on a business trip there yet. So, since I really don't know much about the market (which is why I need to go on a business trip there, hello!), I put some Hawaii news headlines on my daily news site. I just want to express my suprise at the alarming number of "Body found floating in water" headlines I've seen in the last 3 months or so.

Attention people in Hawaii, tourists or otherwise: Wear life jackets!