Teeni Blog is closed for the holidays.

Probably.

This is not a second post for today.

I can't say I'm of the sort that doesn't ask for a lot. In fact, sometimes I want too much and I set my expectations for life, luck and others too high. But for this once I just want something which I can't verbalize concisely. I want to sense peace. I want to be held and hear that everything is going to be okay. I want this feeling to be over. I've conquered far too many cries in the past 7 days and as I'm growing more and more weary, I'm becoming aware that I want to stop warring with how I feel inside.

Sometime soon.

And I thought it couldn't get any worse.

Top 5 worst things that happened last week.

5. Layoffs on Monday (Im safe though).
4. Car battery died last week and again this morning. I had to get a jump to move the car for street cleaning.
3. I got pink-eye. This is one step above having lice.
2. Debuting at number two.....Grandmother dies.
1. Mom has cancer....again.

I need a vacation from my emotions.

The feeling for today:

Utterly saddened.

And now it's Thursday.

Coming at you live from the most depressing week ever. I'm eating chocolate covered macadamia nuts, listening to the Charlie Brown Christmas cd. Two half-assed efforts to comfort myself while I try to forget everything that's going on in my life.

It's not working.

And it's only Wednesday.

Top 5 worst things that happened this week.

5. Layoffs on Monday (Im safe though).
4. Car battery died. I found this out when I went to move the car for street cleaning.
3. Stereolab lady dies.
2. I got pink-eye. This is one step above having lice.
1. Mom has cancer....again.

It can't get any worse now, can it?

Sliding into third: SAFE.

I've been spared once again. Amidst the recent shake-downs, I've stuck to whatever it is I'm sticking to. Luck or skill, I'm velcroed to something stable.

And I can pay one more bill, sign another part of my life away, buy one more holiday present.

If you cut the head off, will a rotten one grow back? Who knows.

If you stay too long to clean out your office will you get escored out? Yes.

And now for the top 5 spams.

5. Give Them security" nikee_master " P r o t e c t y o u r e m p l o y e e s

4. Hello elbo12121 ! Very interesting, Paralegal work from your home

3. __Alert: Children HELP!__ nikeels FW: :)) Frustrated?

2. Niki_santini Enlarge Your Penis Safely and Naturally!

1. Special, kncleung , we can help you.

Honorable mention spam:
....Project is over!!. I told you so, again. weyx

Special kncleung!!!

Okay, not guilt pangs. Something else.

We saw the Kings play Denver on Tuesday. Free food and beer was afoot in our PARTY ZONE. Feeling punchy, I decided to accidentaly walk away with a NBA Playoffs chair cover in my coat. When we got to our seats, I began to have a terrible feeling that someone would notice the chair cover missing and peg me as the suspect and somehow punish me.

I told Greg*: I feel really bad that I took this. Maybe I should give it back.
Greg: You don't feel bad. You're just afraid of getting caught.

And you know what, he was totally right. Often times I have confused my own feelings of regret-empathy with the fear of being caught doing something wrong.
And this kind of goes into my photo haitus. I don't necesarrily feel bad about stealing bandwith by linking directly to someone elses pictures, I'm just afraid of getting caught. I guess I'm lucky that someone hasn't found out what I'm doing and then decided to do something about it.


*Greg. I have to think before I say his name because he looks an awful lot like someone I knew named Aaron.

Tiny magnets.

If I'm not too lazy, I hope to make tiny magnets for my friends this winter holiday. I saw the plans here. I love that site. I just wish I had the energy to be so crafty.

Photos are on haitus. I have been having guilt pangs for linking directly to other peoples photos.

Midweek pleasantries.



Because I'm trying to keep this updated but am feeling lazy (more or less), here are some things that helped me to get out of bed today.

>Panic In Detroit by David Bowie.
>Hanukkah candy.
>Kings.
>Free lunch today at Celestin's with my favorite newspaper.
>Victoria by the Kinks. But changing the song to say Napoleon instead.
>Satsuma mandarins.
>My launch station kicks the crap out of your launch station.
>And don't forget: Oh wait...I just forgot.
>Mini bottles of champagne with a straw.
>"Oh no you didn't" vs. "O no ya didnae."

zzzzz.

So long, Al.



Poor Albert (French: Al-bear) P. Doggstein died during our recording session on Saturday. The ghost of him lives on in Amy's bass overdubs. While this was very upsetting for all of us, and our hearts go out to his owner Shannon, I have to admit that I am somewhat relieved that during his autopsy, the vet did not determine that a errant guitar pick, earphone jack, or shard of guitar string was the cause of death.
Albert succumbed to an undetected stomach tumor at the age of 12.