Snakes, Snails and Puppy Dog Tails

What happened to my sweet little baby? One evening last week, I came home from work and picked Ira up. I put him on my hip and asked him to tell me about his day.

His response: "Poop, poop, fart, fart, poop, poop, fart, fart, poop, poop, fart, fart."

Okay, back down you go. He's going to grow out of this phase eventually, right? Until then I'll just have to savor the early mornings, when Ira is the cuddliest, clingiest monkey. Skinny little arms and legs wrapped all around me. I wrap my housecoat around us both, remembering when he was still so small and we didn't go anywhere without him strapped to my body in some kind of baby holder as if we were still one person.

Hello? Yes, this is Ira.

This picture is from the day we made graham cracker houses (I didn't have the energy for gingerbread). Ira and I got sick on frosting and Sno-Caps. But you know what we found? The reception on this graham cracker phone is fantastic. Four bars everywhere!!!




This kid gets the dual holiday treatment. Here's one from the second night of Hanukkah. I'm not an I love chocolate person, but I have a real affinity for cheap milk-chocolate like this gelt.

General sense of blerginess

If I were a computer, I think I'd need to be restarted in safe mode. There's some serious malware that is making me feel super lame. I'm trying to get through it. Here are some pictures taken with my phone from the last few weeks.


We did our Black Friday nature walk. I love the American River Parkway around late November. In previous years it's been a lovely stark grey moonwalk, with the gorgeous lines of bare branches all around. This year there was still so much green! And some dead salmon. That part was kind of gross, but we had a nice walk anyway.



I am trying to take better care of myself. Here's the day where I got an X-Ray because I am pretty sure I have a stress fracture on this leg. From what? Oh, just jogging. OVER A YEAR AGO. The X-Ray didn't show anything significant (though they rarely do for these kinds of stress fractures), so my doctor ordered a two-phase nuclear bone scan. Sounds fancy, right? Costs about as much as you think it does too: about eleventy millions dollars. I don't part with that kind of cash easily, so I'm getting a second opinion. Hopefully someone can just put me in a walking boot and advise me on some new running shoes and inserts. And in case you're like "what the heck are you doing walking around on a broken leg for a year?" Just remember that I experienced a terribly painful childbirth and it's my right to bring that up whenever I want sympathy. I kid, but also kind of not.




This guy. Man, I love this guy. Everything about him is pretty cool except for when it's not.




When it's not pretty cool, I bust the drink out when he goes to bed. This one here is Rampage IPA. I've had it a few times before and thought it was a positively delightful California IPA, being fragrant and crisp with a lingering grapefruit rind taste. This last bottle I got though was super malty and kind of weird. I drank it anyway.




From the department of useful things. You can bend up a card and use it as a smart phone stand. If you're like me and have so many first world problems, you might one day find yourself saying "ugh! I'm just so tired of holding this phone while I watch a movie on it!"




Leon took me to this awesome vegan soul food place and we ate all of this and more. If this plate of food was a pleasant eBay transaction, I would rate it: A++ Would eat again.





I found a killer recipe in Rick Bayless's Authentic Mexican for aceglas guisadas. I had never heard of it, but when I read the recipe, I practically ate the page. It's potatoes, chard, tomatoes, onion and jalapeno stewed down in broth. It came out so great. I stuffed it in these enchiladas and we ate like kings for three days.

There. That about catches us up.

The dark side

Last night Ira and I went out after bedtime to pick up Leon, who was stranded in Darkest Rancho. Ira had just fallen asleep when I began strapping him into his car seat. He woke up mid-buckle and asked me what we were doing. I couldn't resist a little fooling.

First I tried this: "Good morning! It's time to go to school!"
Ira didn't buy it. "Nawwww, mom. What are we doing?"
Then I went with this one. "Ira, you farted and it smelled so bad that you have to sleep in the car tonight." Sounds totally plausable, right? Plus, potty humor is always a hit with him, but nope. He was too smart for that one too. I came clean. "We have to pick up dad." Ira replied "why can't dad pick himself up?" We all need a little pick me up now and then, don't we? I cannot tell you how fun it is to fool a kid. Have a kid, they're great! For tricking.

In other trickery, my trick leg has been acting up. It's not that serious, but it has been pretty nagging for the last year. It started off as shin splints as I was training for a race and I have a suspicion that it escalated to a stress fracture. It got better after the race, but never quite healed 100%. And although I haven't run since February of this year, anything from jumping jacks or a brisk walk is enough to aggravate it.

Enough has gotten to be enough and so I had an X-Ray done and this is what it looked like:


There is no visible fracture on the X-Ray, but the doc has ordered a bone scan to check for a tiny stress fracture. Until I know what's up, there is absolutely no running or jumping. So don't try to rile me up. Or if you do, I'll just...probably look at you with the disinterest of a lazy cat.