Clearly, your dream is a message from your subconcious telling you to...

Last night I dreamed of pythons slithering around secret rooms in a house I lived in, murders of crows with nowhere else to perch but in the mud and calmness after torrential rains.

I want stuff.

I want this jacket.
I want these shoes.

And I plan to buy one of them as a birthday present for myself pretty soon. Maybe.

Hey, I know you.

So here I am back at school after about three years and I feel like I never left. I see the same people! That bald speedos guy from my swimming class three years ago is still walking around. The round girl with the fashionable hair cuts still looks pissed off, and the same meatheads still hang out around the gymnasium.

As seen on the back of a Chevy truck in the city college parking lot: HAVE YOU DRIVIN OVER A FORD LATLEY

I hope he was on his way to spelling class.

Somebody has a case of the Mondays!

If it weren't for the mac and cheese I had last night, I would be in far worse shape today. A little hung over, I tried to correct my state with the magic three:

citrus
caffine
starch

It worked, but I was left feeling foggy, so I doubled my caffine and now I feel chatty and restless. Somebody please put me out of my misery.